An aspiring pak-thorlogist in the works...
By Algene Tan
I am a student in the School of Love; hoping to graduate with flying colours in the area of this mysterious, but yet wonderful thing called 'love'. One might call me an aspiring pak-thorlogist in the works or so I hope.
Let me share with you how my education in love began...
I had always been in a co-ed school and I used to think that boys are from Mars, but not until I got into secondary school. It changed when a particular chap in my Form 1 class befriended me. He impressed me with his knowledge of computers and he was the top student in my class. His gentle manner made me realised that not all boys are from Mars after all.
Our classmates teased us endlessly about being together. At that time it was 1995, the dating scene in lower secondary school was pretty much considered taboo. We were both good friends, but we never made it clear to each other if we had feelings one another. When Form 2 rolled in, his parents made him change schools. He tried to keep in touch with me, but by that time I had a change of heart and I severed all ties with him. I was cruel indeed, but I was only 14, a rookie in love.
When I was in college, I read a book by Joshua Harris' called, "I Kissed Dating Goodbye". The book encouraged me to begin dating only when Mr. Right pursues me and ONLY when I am ready for marriage. I was determined to keep up with this philosophy from that day onwards.
Despite my new found philosophy, I was still keen to be a pak-thorlogist - learning and experiencing everything that love could teach me.
I remember an incident where my church pastor had to attend to some emergency and he could not deliver his scheduled sermon on Boy Girl Relationships (BGR) that evening for Youth Fellowship. Unless, "One of you (the church's Student Fellowship committee members) delivers the sermon," he said.
"Pastor, we can't," I said. "We are all just pak-thorlogists-in-training!"
He grinned and replied, "Yes, and the rest of you have much to learn before qualifying as one."
I don't know when I will ever graduate from the School of Love, but I still look forward to its lessons each day. Sometimes those lessons hurt and at other times they encourage me. The various exams and tests given in this school are indeed very tough, but every time without fail they all point to the one source of love and that is God Himself.
He is the REAL pak-thorlogist after all.
*Editor: Agree? Disagree? Or just have something to say about this article? Leave a comment or write to us at phasesonline@gmail.com
posted by Phases Online at 3:42 PM
2 Comments:
Harris brings up some good points in his book, but I liken his ban on dating to a recovering alcoholic who thinks it's bad for anyone at any time to ever drink. As he points out, he screwed up (although not quite 'around') substantially as a teenager and a young man and got burned. He does not allow for the fact that there is great variation in people's emotional make-up and the ways in which they relate to one another romantically. I think that casual dating can be likened to other activities that were debated in the early church - see Romans 14 for Paul's comments. The two important points are - follow your conscience while praising God for what you receive, and don't encourage anyone else to go against her/his conscience.
Happy Lupercalia...by this point in history, poor St. Valentine must be rolling in his grave at how pagan his holiday has degenerated to.
14/2/06 9:45 AM
Joshua Harris...He's a bit strict, ain't he?
He had his fair share of 'fun' before drawing up his idealogies.Heh.
Learn from heartaches, build yourself up from them.
It might be embarassing and you will feel like kicking yourself of slinking in a hole thinking about the past, but you'll be stronger.
But that doesn't warrant us all a right to jump guy or girl we see, though.Heh...
22/2/06 5:25 PM
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